Folks, when I read Angela’s comment, it brought tears to my eyes. It’s just been this past summer that my daughter has begun to actually ‘see’ me.

Sweetheart, I keep telling you the pieces you have seen leave this house recently are ones that meant nothing to me. Sure, they were gorgeous but meaningless. So I gave them to people that adored them. Just like we did with Shadow’s kittens.

When I am finally settled, in a house I call my own, then I am going to carve that piece for you…my precious daughter.

Everybody should know that my mom is a really cool person and that I don’t give her gratitude often enough, so I’m here saying, thank you to everyone who has been doing such a great job of filling in for me!

I carved these pieces in 1991, so that makes it a total of 17 YEARS since I was in the state that these pieces are an expression of…

and I kept on expanding over all those years.

How is it for me now?

Hmmmm…

A lot less stressful since I am no longer trying to hide my Presence from the World.

Anchoring, grounding and integrating the awareness of eternal realities does take its toll on our human form. There’s only so fast we can go, before we’re really pushing the envelope, as the saying goes. It’s a lot like re-wiring a toaster, so it can be directly plugged into a high voltage transmission line. (smiling)

Like I keep saying, it’s not about Perfection, physical or otherwise. It’s about our RESPONSES to “imperfection”.

now is called july 2008 … eight months later … how is it for you now?

Angelina Jolie’s lips have me more facinated. I just have a desire to wet them and stick her to something. It must be that I’m envious. The only way my mouth would get that much attention is if I took my teeth out.

{{Grace}} I am Honored by your Love’s extension. It is SPIRIT that does ‘this’ to me, makes me the way I am. The way SPIRIT has done to so many of us through the years. And seeks to do with/to ALL of us.

Whatever you see expressing itself through me, is in YOU, too! Within ALL of us! From where I’m coming from, it’s completely Natural. We’ve simply been taught different, that’s all and that’s IT.

In the yingyang symbol, there is white in the black and black in the white. We all have both, black and white, masculine and feminine, left and right. We’re just not used to relating them together in cooperation. We’re used to divide and conquer. Be Righteous and Dominate to the point of exclusion.

The way control works is by keeping us ignorant. Sense is what can free us and unite us. It’s basic math. If I want to add fractions I’ve got to find a common denominator and SENSE is what I found. Common sense. The ability to relate cause and effect.

Knowing we live in a Universe that can be Trusted goes a LONG WAY.

SuperHuman? Me? No, I tried that, ‘supermom’, ‘superwife’ ‘superdaughter’, ‘supersister’…, damn near killed myself.

Then I discovered that being Divine does not mean being Superhuman. Just as being Eternal is not the same thing as being immortal. When we quit trying to be one, we discover we’re the other.

The only difference between ‘me’ and anyone else, is in recognition and realization and, I don’t have any kind of monopoly or special pull with the bureaucrat of the universe on that.

All the pumps at our Divine gas station are free and self service. I’m just a walking sign giving directions for any who’d like to fill their own tanks there, too. Call it my way of ‘greening up the earth’.

When you speak of pain, it is/was the pain of isolation that feels the worse. It really doesn’t matter which direction from ‘normal’ we are. The distancing hurts. The further we are, the more seperated we feel. But it was what drove me to use my ‘gift’ in a way none of us, as far as I know, tried before.

Instead of giving up on relating to people, I targeted being able to relate to everyone. Instead of none I chose all. One extreme to the other, that’s me.

Why have I destroyed every picture? You go live out in the woods without potable water for a few years and see if you want to have YOUR picture taken. rofl

I didn’t want any visual reminders of my trip to Ninevah, basically. It was hard on me. Getting past it, healing it, beginning to come back, is what I’ve spent the last couple of years doing.

It wasn’t but 8 months ago I started writing under my name. I’d surrendered even that. I was faceless. I was an Idea. I was also 5’7″ tall and weighed 111 pounds, a size 2. I called it an effect of collapsing into a singularity…”Oneness”.

But it hurt to sit down because I’d be balancing on bones.

I wrote on my ‘about’ page I moved here to die. And a very big part of me did. The part of me that was standing in the way of me, personally, being in person, as came out of the inside of me. A part of me died to be here. I think that is what is meant by ‘sacrifice’.

And in all Honesty, as painful as it was, it was my own fault. The part of me that is no longer, was a part that wasn’t ever real. Didn’t ever serve me, either. Wasn’t dedicated to my own good.

I’m getting better. I’ve got a face. My name is my name again. You can look me up in the phone book. I’ve just decided to blow all my sheets to the wind, as my mom would say. I’m bringing ALL of me into expression and chips are going to fall where they may.

My trips to the hospital opened up my eyes. I have an effect on everyone, doesn’t matter who. Something along the lines of ‘pastoral care’ without any of the pastorization.

I needn’t be afraid of extermination any more. Because that’s the real goal of our distancing, to emotionally starve a person into behavior modification. And I couldn’t ‘be’ that.

It’s like the planet Uranus is off balance when it comes to rotating sideways instead of up and down like the rest of the planets in the solar system. It’s axis is tilted more then a few bubbles off center. That’s what Spiritual sight does to us. And I can’t help it.

And I can manage and steward resources but haven’t ever been able to make an income. I can’t *take* the regularity of 9-5. I blow. if I don’t blow, my blood pressure rises to levels that can’t even be measured in emergency rooms.

It’s kinda’ like I gave up. An Idiot Savant, is that what it’s called? I’m really really good at one thing. And just one thing.

And this is it.

Smiling.

I would venture to guess that many of our Legendary artisans and musicians were considered weird and crazy for their gifts as well.

Now G.W., he’s REALLY crazy.

You? You are a genius. I’ve never had the priveledge of knowing anyone like you, Sue Ann. From what I’ve read…and feel…from you, you are a SuperHuman. A person who is in touch with ALL of their brain…not living like the rest of us cretains, from a small percentage. 10% 15%? Who knows.

I was going to say I wish I could do the same. And then the pain you’ve experienced washes over me.

WHY have you destroyed every picture taken of yourself?

Welcome, welcome, welcome!

Oh, the studies you had sound so interesting. Hands on experience, too. I’ve never handled glass hot before. The furthest I’ve gotten is to wonder what sort of effects I can create with gold and a high temperature kiln. I haven’t experiemented with it yet, though.

I’m beginning to get an inkling why they never sold. Ding-a-ling me, I’m not stupid, just dense.

I imagined it was because I didn’t have any creditials. Like you have creditials. I have no pedigree, no training, no education. I don’t look good on paper when it comes to ‘art’.

Other things maybe but, not art. “Who the hell are you?”, was the question and, the only repsonse I had to give was “me”.

Funny thing you mention that I have shown pictures of my self. Yes, I have. This is what I pulled out of inside me. Yes, it was both ecstasy and agony doing it.

Here’s the real kicker.

There is no picture of me, of what I look like, anywhere on the net. I, personally, have destroyed every picture of me taken over the past 6 years.

And one of my husband’s occupations over the years, was professional portrait photographer.

Now isn’t that a bit odd?

YOURS, however…reflect your soul…tortured, nurtured…it’s all there Sue…it’s all so beautiful and palpable…

Thank you for posting pics of your Self….

Peace in,
Lil

The niche we found was in restoration. We work with investors, taking houses off lists of ‘to be demolished’. In most cases, the owners cannot afford to bring the house up to code and, the city will bulldoze it, then send the owner the bill, then foreclose on the property since the owner cannot afford to pay the bill.

We come in, pay the owner a fair price, then renovate it up to code, ending up creating AFFORDABLE housing. Nice little houses that don’t cost a fortune and are safe. We happen to think that we all deserve to live in something nice and cute, without having to mortgage our futures to the hilt.

Everybody wins! The owner, the investor, us and the neighborhood.